Interviews, Emails and Rejection. part 1

Over the last two weeks I have really amped up my efforts to gain employment, turning my lackadaisical attitude into one of total determination. The reality of the ever shrinking numbers on my husband's paycheck helped to light the fire in me to find a way to bring more cash into the house. Back in the old days when his pay went down we just cut way back on our living expenses, but now that our kids are older, and more expensive on their own, I don't want the ebbs and flows of the economy to interfere with their activities. On top of that I am really ready to get back into the mix, even if that does cause me much maternal conflict.
If I am being totally honest, I am not a dream candidate, my job history is skitter scattered around my stay at home mom years, and I've never really stayed in one position long enough to get off of a probationary contract (usually 3 years is the minimum). No matter how impressed any school might be about my education (I can't tell for sure if they care or not) the fact that I am all theory and no (or very little) practice means that I am a risk.
The school district that I really wanted to work in advises applicants not to contact school principals because it just gets "too overwhelming" for them. So imagine my dismay upon discovering that they are only giving interviews to applicants who make personal contact with them..hmmmmmmmm?!?!?!?!?! I sat at my computer for an entire day customizing emails to all the schools I'd hoped to possibly work for, remembering to attach my resume most of the time. I only addressed one female as a "Mr." so all in all I felt pretty good about my effort. At that point I thought I'd just sit back and wait for them to come begging......
Cue the crickets........................................
I have always been granted an interview once I'd turned in an application, so not hearing from even one principal in a period of 2 months of it being on file and then after a few weeks after making "personal contact" was only slightly discouraging. Then a small clue to my lack of success landed in my inbox in the form of an email that was never intended to come to me. It was from my former principal, who assured me that she would give nothing but rave reviews on my behalf
It read:(names have been changed to protect the innocent and the bitchy)

She is smart, calm, and easy going. Almost too easy going. Very low key and low energy level. She had a tendency to be negative if the people around her were negative. She didn't start it, didn't cause any problems, or wasn't a drama queen, but she doesn't stay away from it either. She was a special ed teacher for us and she was paired with a nasty, opinionated special ed teacher that was used to home schooling her kids. The other teacher is Fred so and so's wife. I can't remember her last name. I think a lot of people in our district know Fred. Anyway, Suburban Psychotic may be too low key for you, but she may be a pretty good teacher.

Two faced Lying Bitch
Principal
Dill Weed Elementary

Well holy mother of Mike, who in their right mind would grant such a candidate an interview???? I won't even bring up the fact that offering such personal opinions in a job reference are illegal in my state, though I guess I just did.
I had no idea how to react, so I replied as diplomatically as I possibly could. The yellow is obviously personal commentary that was not inlcuded in the actual email

Dearest Bitchface liar,
Did you mean to send this to me? If so, I do appreciate your honesty. (even though I think you're a hooker who wears too much make up)
I'm not sure how to respond except to say that the year I worked at Dill Weed Elementary was very difficult for me in my personal life, my husband was not working due to a severe back injury and I had two jobs and two small children to care for at the time. I was purposely "low key" because my partner (who is still my very good friend and was only disliked because she called everyone out on their bullshit) and my department head(who did not do her job, but was best friends with the building admin)hated each other. I did my best to focus on the students so as to stay out of the drama and negativity that was inescapable.
I did think I left on good terms (mostly because you told me two months ago that you remembered me fondly) and was hopeful to come back to the district (but I guess I can bend over and kiss that dream goodbye).
Like I said, I do appreciate your honesty (even though it seems to be a relatively new concept for you).
Thanks,
Suburban Psychotic

You'll have to wait for my next post to find out how all this ended up...