Thursday, June 24, 2010

A peek inside...

My brain has this amazing ability to latch on to random information (while at the same time completely deleting all information about the locations of my keys and check card) that often makes me appear incoherent to the general population. See its this random information that guides many of my decisions and behaviors and then when I try to explain myself I end up sounding like I need a straight jacket. Instead of constantly trying to explain myself I figured I could create a reference post, so if you ever doubt my sanity you can come here to see that I am a completely rational person.

SO this is why:

I hate the beach, it makes complete sense to me that swimming in poo water would be ill advised.

I become OCD when I making pork, or chicken. It could kill you, literally.

I refused a CT scan when my 6 year old broke his nose. I really pissed the doctor and radiologists off, but seriously, I was totally justified.

I will always be fat. This is depressing and just makes me want to eat chocolate.

I'm pretty sure we will all die from skin cancer in the end anyways.

I don't think I'll ever be able to take my kids to India. Damn Monkeys ruin it for everyone.

I have so much guilt over eating cows. Why must they be so tasty?

I won't go to the circus. The elephants, think of the elephants.

I'm scared of granite counter tops. That's right, they are deadly and you will die.

I had to replace all my non-stick pots and pans. Food, its gonna kill you.

I won't heat anything up in a plastic container. If the food doesn't kill you, the packaging will.

I have a few more, but I'll save them for later. Have a fabulous day and try not to die.

1 comment:

m said...

i feel the same way about food safety. if it's past the date (even ONE day), i WILL throw it away.